Anyway, i was in Game today purchasing dubious games on the PS3 (by that i mean dubiously good games, not sexually deviant ones) and i looked around me and found that, bar the staff, i was actually standing in a building filled with social rejects and weirdos.
I counted 4 other customers in the shop beside myself and each looked like they suffered from a serious affliction. One clearly hadn't seen light in weeks, another was a woman who had the appearance and all the mannerisms of a man and the one that was closest to me smelt so pungently of stale sweat and body odour that i almost gagged.
And then there was me. I started to panic, wondering if someone of note could walk past at any second and possibly think i was one with these people, some sick brotherhood of social outcasts out on a day trip to garner more games before scuttling back to our pits to blot out reality!!
I made my purchase and swiftly left, feeling suddenly ashamed - as if what i'd just bought was the hardest core of porn and concealing it, shame faced, beneath my coat like a grubby addict.
This is what i fear the most - i wake some nights, screaming, drenched in sweat and have to run to the mirror to check i'm still who i think i am.
(Incidentally i didn't photoshop the pic, some other whacky japester did that. And to hilarious effect i might add).
My question, albeit rhetorical, is this: is gaming really the social equivalent of blurting out, in the midst of your peers, that you enjoy stamp collecting or model railways? Surely there are enough gamers out there now who actually have a concept of reality to outweigh all the nutters that invariably flock in their droves to the warm embrace of gaming escapism?
I consider myself a gamer but not in the sense that i engage in heated debates over which Final Fantasy character could beat the other, working myself up into a frenzy until i'm foaming at the mouth - i'm also proud to say that i've never fantasized over Lara Croft.
I love games but not so much that i'd neglect to wash or even bother to make friends anymore, opting instead to live in a fantasy world like The Matrix where anything is possible and you're not just a poor, lonely soul but a misunderstood and as yet undiscovered hero.
Obviously now you can all tell me that i'm all of the things above and that i've just convinced that myself i'm not :p
LMAO!
ReplyDeleteActually Mark, I'm a figment of your imagination, so is Biffa and your missus, You have become so addicted you can no longer seperate realtiy from the games you play. Think about it, Your life in Camborne could not possibly be real, the sloth is though.
Actually on a serious note though (boooo) loads of relationships have broken down because of addiction to gaming. Is it called gaming?
ReplyDeleteIf life in Wanga was a game it should be banned - the Daily Mail would've already petitioned the public for it's removal from the shelves. Actually i kind of wish it was a game, that way i could just turn it off or trade it in and it would all go away.
ReplyDeleteOh the Sloth's real alright, any misconception i may have had about that is usually dissolved when the Sloth sits there with his man boobs flapping out stinking up the house. It seriously brought tears to my eyes the other day when he crawled out of his hole and i smelt him - one plus point was that he sat on one of kayleighs scarves that she left on the chair and afterwards it was unusable because of the stench that had permeated into it. I suggested incinerating it but she's going to wash it a few times first.
Yeah it's called gaming i spose :p Fortunately i have a sympathetic girlfriend though - the people i referred to in the blog have never had a girlfriend and are terrified by the thought of a woman that they can't move around with a control pad.
I'm the same with browsing the world cinema section in HMV - it's always certain types of people and you feel ashamed to even be associated with them. It happens at cinemas too but people looked down their noses at me when I dared show my face at a screening of Good Night and Good Luck a coupla years ago. The shame!
ReplyDeleteI too browse the world cinema section so i'll count myself among the people you try and avoid :p I'm not that bad, i try to leave my mac and wide rimmed glasses at home and i keep the dribbling to a minimum as well.
ReplyDeleteI definately know what you mean though, if you want to see scary social upbringing then next time cast your eye over to the anime section. Last time i was there there was a guy next to me who was looking at anime covers who seemed partially aroused and another guy who very vocally gave a constant narrative to himself to whatever he was looking at and what he thought of it. I was just hoping he didnt look at me and blurt out that he wanted to kill me.